C4 here I come

I'm working at old medical block now. It is a male ward for patient with chronic illnesses. Basically, I'm taking care of nephro, PTB, HIV patients and others that transferred from the new block. As usual, there is 2 housemen in the ward. Julian and I were previously at the same ward. And yet,now we are posted to the same ward again. The funniest part is that even my medical officer is transferred to the same ward. This is pretty rare in my hospital. This means that he is going to be my boss from day 1 to the last day of my medical posting. Haha... Same people, just different environment and staff nurses. There are around 30 patients in the ward. It means that each of us takes care of 15 patients. However, the work load is lesser compared to aras. There is less blood and radiographic investigation. And the houseman does not need to clerk new case at the emergency department. There is no mo round during the weekend. I finish my job earlier.

This means I have more free time. Initially, it is difficult to adjust myself from a hectic lifestyle to a more relaxing environment. I found that I start eating and sleeping more and gain weight. I start going for gym, shopping, cell group, dinner...etc. At least, life is not about working.

I'm going to finish my medicine posting soon. Im looking forward my end posting holiday. I really hope to go for travelling. Anyone interested, kindly inform.... :)

Life as a houseman

• leave your house before sunrise & back house after sunset
• work 7 days a week including weekend and public holidays
• BD rounds /day (for medicine only)
• write down whatever your boss said during ward round
• complete the task that ordered by ur boss
• clerk cases
• take blood & set branula
• run or even rush for x-ray, ultrasound, ct scan...
• oncall-work for 2 days 1 night
• 'entertain' patients, boss & hospital staff
• stay chill even being scolded
• life is about sleep, work, eat
• holiday is a priviledge, but not right

Housemanship

I'm back. Firstly, I would like to apologize for not blogging for months. There were some major changes in my life. I started working at malacca. New place meant new life. It could be miserable. But, so far so good. It was not my first time to settle down at a new town. And, I was not totally alone. I still had ivern staying with me, n dear chai jiun hanging out with me.... Glad to have u gals with me for the most challenging moment in my life. U only never understand powerful of familiar faces.

I was at the medical department for the past 2 months. Things started to settle down. At least I had a house at malacca, knew what to do in the ward, and how to function as a houseman. I was no longer a lost lamb that did not know the final destination. I was no longer struggled. Clerking patient, indent medication and blood taking had become finger tips. Pleural tapping, CVP line insertion and peritoneal dialysis yet to be explored. I still could remember the first day I started my round. A patient ended up to have UGIB. Blood was everywhere. I was shocked when I faced this. I did nothing. My superior probably was mad at me. However, he did not say anything. My first call was at day 16 old. I was screwed for not indent the old medications at the drug chart. Actually, I was afraid to do it. I was still not sure about the medication used. I afraid that my mistake would do harm to the patient. And my first patient that asconded after I saw her at the A&E. She pulled her branula out and ran away. I stood there n paused for few minutes before I seek for help. She should have asconded before I clearked her. Haha..Oh ya, my first pleural tap in front of medical students. Luckily, MO next door came and rescued me.. and so on....

I was no longer at my the ward I used to be for the past 2 months. I was at the clinic for 1 week before I went to the male ward. I really enjoyed the office hour when I was at the clinic. It started at 8+am and finished at around 4-5pm. There was around 100-200 patients every day waiting for u. What I did was seeing patient non-stop like a robot. And yet I felt the job was more relaxing compared to ward work.

Life as a houseman is never ending. And yet, so many things are waiting for me!

Live from Pasir Gudang

Today is day 7 I have been 'quarantined' at Pasir Gudang. Thanks God I have a night free for me to 'slip out' and blog. For the past 7 days, I was spending almost 24 hours a day in the place where I had my induction course, Hotel Selesa, Pasir Gudang. My life was all about food, sit and sleep. The hotel was fastatic. I really felt like 'holiday' here. Well, not really lah..I was having lecture, individual task, and group discussion every day (sometimes it could drag until midnight). For every alternate day, I woke up early in the morning, 6.30AM for exercise & played games in the evening. We ate buffet food that served by the hotel every day. The hotel served mainly malay food. The food was good. There were abundant of food served in the hotel. "Food, food, food.." It was just everywhere. Haha..

Well, I did not come to Pasir Gudang for holiday. I will spend 2 weeks there for my induction course and BTN camp at Ulu Sepri, Rembau before I start working as a houseman. Oh ya, I got my posting already. I got my 2nd choice and was posted to Malacca Hospital. I will report to work after my BTN camp. Pretty fast right, cannot imagine how is my life there in Malacca...Now, I feel abeit anxious, curious, scared...juz a mixture of feeling! I'm not sure whether I can cope well with new environment. Everything just back to the beginning. New life, new challenge and new goal....

I should talk more about my induction course. Basically, from year 2008 onwards, all the housemen have to attend the course and the BTN camp before they started working. All the lectures are about government system, policies etc and life as a houseman. I have lecture from day to night. Can u imagine how is my life? U can only know if u experience it. Really 'boring' lah...can feel that my brain isnt functioning well. Ya, the air-con in the hall really make me feel sick. There is respiratory infection endemic in my group. I hope that I can stay well and healty. What should I do? Eat more vegetables and fruits, exercise (this one is lacking as I'm lazy) and last stress free loh. The last one is abeit hard to achieve. I have essay and presentation to do. At the end of the course, there are objective and subjective exam questions waiting for me..aiyo really headache lah..The syllabus is tough as I only have 2 weeks to learn all the things. No matter what..just try my best!!

Ok ok..that's all! All the best for me. Really miss my family, batchmates at malacca and frens that I havnt meet for a long time. Miss u all!

My new toy

my new laptop

After months of researching and planning, finally i bought my new laptop. This was the 3rd time i'm using it. So many new things, I still couldnt get use to it. I still have much to learn......

Murmuring...

2 funerals in 3 weeks...I was exhausted physically and mentally. I just felt something missing in my life. I lost my father and grandmother in 3 weeks time. Why did all these happen to my family? And in such short period of time.......who could stand all these? Why, why and why? I just wondered. I could fell like I became 'quiet' these few weeks. I rarely talked especially to strangers. I just did not have the mood to make new friends. Was I griefing? This might the only answer medically.

For the past few days, i kept on asking myself again and again. " What is life? Why is human being brought to this world?" To enjoy, suffer or pay debt? I was searching for the answer. I believed that everything happened for a reason. It was just as simple as you would fail your exam if you did not study hard. "How do you explain those which born mentally or physically challenge?" "Is this a lesson for their sinful parents, debt from the baby's previous life or as a result from a negligent doctor?" Nobody could give a certain answer. " How do you decide the duration of the survival in this world?" " Is there a guideline for all these?" Perhaps only God knows. "Why do we suffer from illness?" Some diseases run in the family. What we could see was most of the family members passed away due to the disease itself or its complications. "Is this a curse for the family itself?" "Why do the period of suffering from a disease to death differ from people to people?"

So many why...my mind was at haywire. And the last why.." Why dont all these questions appear while I'm still a medical student?" Perhaps I was not care enough.

If you have the answers for the questions stated above, you are welcomed to drop me a msg or mail to me. Thanks!!!

A letter to my father

Dear father,

Dad, I know you have tried your best. I hope you can rest in peace. I shall have done better. I promise to put more effort to become a good doctor, perhaps a better one. Thanks for your support throughout my medical school years. I will remember you always. I never forget all the time we spend together. We always drink Chinese tea and red wine together. You are the one who tell me all about Chinese tea and red wine. Dad, I will never forget the time we spent together, especially Shanghai, Beijing and recent Genting trip. Thanks for all the good memories you give to me. At last, dad, I will miss you always. Thanks for everything. Please forgive any mistakes I have done. I'm sorry. Thanks for everything!!!

Love you always,
Daughter.

The Last Dinner As A Batch!!

Look at everyone at the photo! Do we look different after 2 weeks break? For me, we are still the same. We are who we are. Just that we finished med school and going to enter a new chapter of life.

We had our graduation dinner at Impiana KLCC Hotel. It was raining that day, pretty heavy. At the last minute, I decided to use Cheras way since it was quite dark and I might miss the road signs if I used Putrajaya-KL highway. Cheras way was famous for its traffic jam. Urghh...really felt frustructed when i stucked into 'stupid' traffic jam. I did not want to be late.

I was glad that we reached there safe. I was happy to meet everyone there. Familiar faces, friendly smile..it was just like back to the old days. I couldnt believe that we had graduated and working soon. 'Transition period was always never easy' said by one of the lecturer. In my mind, I am still a medical student. However, in a month time, I'm a doctor. I either save or kill people. Hahaa...

Thanks for the committee for organising a such nice dinner! All the best to everyone! I gonna to miss u all!!!